For some months now my prayer before the Blessed Sacrament has been “I do believe, help my unbelief.” (Mark 9:24)Even tho I look up at the monstrance and physically see bread inside, I know it’s Jesus... I do. Do I? Yes. But...really? Yes. I do. .......(eyes move side to side) Stepping out of my catholic-ness and looking into a Blessed Sacrament Chapel...we’re all insane. We’ve lost our minds. So, you’re telling me that little piece of bread is Jesus? That’s crazy. Not only that, but, there are people that sit in front of it for hours and just stare and pray?? We should all be admitted! “This is a difficult statement; who can listen to it?” (John 6:60) But...”Lord, to whom shall we go?” (John 6:68) So, with faith, we stay with Jesus and we believe. We believe that inside the monstrance is the King of the World, even tho everything that we know tells us there’s no. way. that’s. possible. Have you ever heard of the Eucharistic miracle that occurred in Faverney, France in 1608? I read the story to my kids in the beautiful children’s book, Stories of the Blessed Sacrament, and I was bawling. Total ugly cry, had to put the book down to wipe my snot away, and keep crying, crying. I just kept thinking....Jesus...that is you. It IS you! Please, help us believe and love you more! God knows we believe, but He wants to help our unbelief! He desires so strongly for us to love Him truly present in the Eucharist that He makes the Eucharist fly...or even bleed real blood that has been scientifically tested and proved to come from a 33-ish year old man that has gone through severe trauma! Jesus is the Eucharist. How many times do we stop and actually think about this when going up for Communion? Or sitting for our weekly Adoration time? We are sitting with God. Holy. Moly. And what do we do about it? What do we do with this Truth? With this Reality? How much are we willing to give of ourselves to a God that is continually coming down from Heaven to give us this IMMENSE blessing? If we believe that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist....how does that belief...that we say “Amen” to every Sunday, how is that affecting our life? If we believe that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist...is spending an hour with Him on a Sunday enough? Does that seem appropriate, even? One hour a week and that’s it? “So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth.” (Revelation 3:16) I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be spit out. So Jesus, please I beg you, help me believe more deeply than I ever have before, in your True Presence. (Read about the flying Eucharist here...it is insane!!) http://www.therealpresence.org/eucharst/mir/english_pdf/Faverney.pdf (Stories of the Blessed Sacrament) https://amzn.to/2oHOIX7 Text Copyright Stephanie Stovall 2019
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The day before this interview with Oklahoma Catholic Radio I found out I was miscarrying once again.
I didn’t have the brain power to go through re-scheduling and a part of me just wanted to do this for Him. I wanted to “praise Him in the storm.” I thought, I do so much God talk and now I have this opportunity to share with people what He did for my life…and I’m going to cancel because I’m sad? No, I wanted to keep the appointment…and prayed God would do the cancelling for me. That night, Oklahoma was hit with the most random August tornadoes and I was like, dang, God. Impressive. I just knew the station wasn’t going to have power and we’d have to reschedule. Even though every single traffic light was out as I drove to OKCR the next morning, the station still had power. Deacon Larry started the interview and I couldn’t even remember the beginning of my own life story. I didn’t have anything in me to give. I felt so empty. Physically and spiritually. I said to God, “I have nothing. Please, Come Holy Spirit. You’re going to have to tell this story for me.” And it began. I love this story so much. It is a story about God’s immense love and mercy. It is a story about how God truly does keep His promises to us. He does bring great joys out of intense suffering, even the worst suffering imaginable. I came to faith because of a 17 year old girl named Lauren Burton. It is because of her life that I have the life I do today, with a husband I am in awe of, 5 little boys that drive me crazy 😊 … and three tiny souls in Heaven - along with Lauren, praying us on. Here is the story of my first ever God moment… 17 years ago… Stephanie Text Copyright Stephanie Stovall 2019 |
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